Sometimes we feel like everyone around us has a plan and has their life all figured out, when in reality most of us are in the same boat. From the outside it might look like we know what we’re doing but really we have no clue. For a person like me who likes having everything planned out, I found it hard to come to terms with the fact that it’s okay to not know exactly what you want to do with your life.
Whatever stage you’re in in your life, whether that’s school, uni, just graduated or working life, we all think we need to know exactly what our next move will be or where we want to be 5 years later.
School makes us feel like we need to have our dream job completely narrowed down in our heads by the time we leave when actually, most people go into uni by just picking the subject they enjoy rather than having a clear goal of what career path they want to take. Most people don’t actually have their life all figured out.
We all get jealous of those people that have been doing internships every year and completely know the job they want to go into. I wanted to be that person, and while I’m still trying to research and think about my future, I’m not worrying about it as much as I used to. Sure, I have a few ideas of areas I want to go into and things I want to accomplish in my life but I’ve stopped trying to completely pin point everything and plan every last detail.
We all fall into the trap of spending so much time thinking about the future and how we want our lives to go that we don’t just live in the moment and figure it out as we go along. We get so caught up in knowing every little detail and we stress ourselves out when we don’t completely know what we want our life to look like.
When I was younger I had a set plan for my life; I wanted to be a teacher, move out straight after uni, married by 25 and kids by 28 and that’s exactly how I wanted my life to go. Now I look back and think about how that kind of thinking just makes you panic more. Putting things on a time scale and planning to that extent or more just stops you from enjoying your life because you keep thinking about how you’re not quite where you wanted to be at that point in your life and end up disappointed.
Everything happens at different times in everyone’s lives so there’s no point trying to figure it all out right now. I think we all need to remind ourselves every now and again that it’s okay to be uncertain about your life, after all, isn’t that what makes the future exciting?
For me, it was always so hard because I don’t particularly like the unknown, even when it comes to books and films I look up the ending, because it’s scary not knowing how things will pan out. But getting over that fear and just relaxing and trusting that eventually everything will fall into place is the way I’m trying to be now.
Planning never works out the way you want it to anyway, you’re bound to have a set idea and then change your mind a few times. I think we all feel pressure to have our life all figured out and have a 5-year plan or know what the hell we want to do with our lives. But everyone does things at their own pace and gets to their goals eventually. We end up feeling lost when we don’t have a plan and we need to stop thinking that we’re lost because we aren’t, we don’t need to know everything about our future.
We should be trying new things and experiencing everything and not just getting stuck on having one set goal that we never branch out and see what else is out there. Learning to push away the stress and the voices telling you to figure out what you want and just letting yourself breathe and enjoy what’s happening right now is something I think most of us could use a little help on, especially me.
Do any of you worry too much about trying to have your life all figured out?
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